and let’s not forget that it comes with the caveat that now you’re expected to have a friggin conversation with some weirdo because they dished $16 for the pleasure of hitting on you

(Source: narandewaifu, via jommyteelones)

Tags: louis ck

I am Basil Hallward forever trying to be Dorian Gray and not nearly a good enough artist or pretty enough to be either.

Today I described my brunch to Jameson.

  • Me: Its already almost gone so I'll paint a word picture:
  • Me: Sizzling pancetta bits, which provided tastiness for the sauteed kale, which rests lovingly atop a charred halved tortilla beside a bed of fluffy scrambled eggs BATHED in spicy ketchup and cholula
  • Me: And of course a cup of tea.
  • Me: OH AND I ALMOST FORGOT THE LIGHT DUSTING OF PARMESEAN

Tags: life

"Make all your decisions based on how hilarious it would be if you did it."

— Aubrey Plaza  (via missys-abode)

(Source: champagneanddiscosticks, via fat-beyonce)

Tags: aubrey plaza

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Tags: life

I want to leave New York.

But I keep repeating in my head: I was Jacques in Paris, I am Jacques in New York, and I would be Jacques in Algiers…

Tags: life

thrillsarecheap:

The Libertines 2002

by David Ellis.

(via dirtysmalltowngirl)

"I was at a bar in the lower east side last week, alone, and there was this couple on a date. And I was watching them and the girl reminded me of you— she was from New Jersey, but she still lived there. Jersey City or Hoboken or something. But she was on this date, hoping to impress this guy who’s a financer or investment banker or something—and good for him!—and it looked like she’d made it out. She was here in Manhattan in this nearly empty bar on a Friday night with this guy— so she’d made it out. She’d escaped. But only through the tunnel and only on weekends."

— Paraphrasing

OSCAR FINGAL O’FLAHERTIE WILLS WILDE

My my what a name sir.

Tags: oscar wilde